tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59178604323477094532024-02-06T19:57:44.259-08:00Word, World, Moredksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.comBlogger49125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-84587307261732160612011-05-29T10:18:00.000-07:002011-05-29T10:37:34.588-07:00Blog MovedHi Everyone,<br /><br />I've switched over to the wordpress side. You can find me new blog at: wordworldwhirlwind.wordpress.comdksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-51123993696137135152011-03-29T16:20:00.000-07:002011-03-29T16:21:29.326-07:00Too Short to Slam, Too Long to Save for LaterSometimes I swear I can feel my soul smiling <p class="MsoNormal">Strings across my ribcage like a pearl necklace </p> <p class="MsoNormal">I’m not quite sure why I’d wear a pearl necklace</p> <p class="MsoNormal">But the soul wants what the soul wants</p> <p class="MsoNormal">And it string across my ribcage like a pearl necklace</p> <p class="MsoNormal">A perfect parabola of compressed content</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Compressing doubts and anxieties</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Until they liquefy, drip, then waterfall</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Leaving my soul 75% lighter<br />Light enough to smile.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">To be clear: this is not the laughter of the soul</p> <p class="MsoNormal">There is no expansive, proselytizing joy </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="">There is no agape. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">This is the absence of worry. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">This is ukulele and kazoo music indoors, with a view of a sunny, 45 degree day outside. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">This is my soul smiling. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"> </p>dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-896408274731733312011-02-07T18:58:00.000-08:002011-02-07T19:01:38.028-08:00Iam'sThis one needs a bit more editing, but I'll throw it up there for comments/viewing.<br /><br /><p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >If I wanted to be an entrepreneur</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >The only innovation I could offer </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Would be ways to sell myself</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Now I am happy</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Now I am relaxed</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Now I am bold</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Now, I am tired of the iambs</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >So I would shout every trochee</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >If messages could actually escape me</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >If the sound waves could reach civilization, or nature, </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Or anything outside of this Alcatraz island on which I self-wreck </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" ><b><u>I am </u></b></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" ><span style=""> </span>conceptually confined </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Within a prison built of bars </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Of Self-hymns and self-hate </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Where substantial thought </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Is necessarily always worn away by the incessant brain waves </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Of self-absorption, until only grated, scorching fragments</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Stand under my feet </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >If only I could launch out to sea</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >For Blind Homer could see that </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Helen had a face to launch a thousand ships</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >But I only have the hell in facing my own immobility </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" ></span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >For I am still-sick, but I long to be motion-sick. </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Long gone from this island </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Where my speed of departure can only be measured</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >In knots that untangle in my gut</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >And from around the sinusoidal grip on my psyche </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >And so I would barter all my iam words and thoughts</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >To be an immigrant on a strange ship</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Underneath a single Constellation that could guide me to a foreign land </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Or even a whole new galaxy</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Because recently self has been the only universal </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >In my universe of a sucking black hole</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >So there is no dimension </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Or rather life is only 1-Dimmensional, I-Dimmensional, </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >But life is so much fuller </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >I trust</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >And I still remember</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Therefore Give me but one frontier, the first frontier </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >From tears, from smiles, from here, from there </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >But not from me, not from I am </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Give me the royal we, </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Or just you</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Or just he </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >I long for the tempest </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Or Climate change</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Sink this Altcataz island</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >And let me see if I can float. </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Or if you could, build me a railway out of this prison</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Strap me to a locomative and call me conductor </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >So it is physically possible for me to once again </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >soak back up external energy from</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" ><span style=""> </span>Faith </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Altruism</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Biology </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >PINEAPPLE </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Next time we speak </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >I hope we speak of unthinkably mundane </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >As long as it’s not stuck in the mud of this muck</span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >Cuz, as you’ve seen, I’m stranded by habitual choice </span></p> <p style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12pt;" >And am starting to go selfishly insane. </span></p>dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-3228250001166665202011-02-07T18:56:00.000-08:002011-02-07T18:58:27.312-08:00New Year's Resolution Number 11<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:130%;">New Year’s Resolution Number 11 </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Swagger</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Is Mental Tickling</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">It is playful, mock aggression </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">necessarily directed at others</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">But please do not be alarmed</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">If you proceed to L.O.L. throughout the duration</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Of this poem</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">It simply means your mentally ticklish<span style=""> </span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Yeah I’m about to swagercize all over this room </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Like I had red kicks with springs at my soul </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Jumping out to you </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">With a track jacket </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">That had my last name and your new favorite number on the back </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">That’d be my phone number</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Yeahhh, I’m about to swagger </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Like I was walking into a party </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">And pointing so much </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">You thought I was choreographing a scatter plot </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">Yeahh, I’m about to swagger so large </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">You’ll need a satellite that has an orbital </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Going through at least 14 zodiac signs just to capture the </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Full<span style=""> </span>picture </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Yeah, I’m about to swagger so hard </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">The ground might break like tension </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">Yeah I’m about to swagger</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">But first, </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Maybe I should check what I’m swaggering about</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Because this nagging voice I know better than most of my fb friends </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Keeps asking me if I’m a confident man</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Or just a con man </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Because confidence is a self-congratulatory hi-five routine </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">It is the songs you sing in the shower </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">The glow that sticks when the name-drops are cropped, </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">The hi-fives do stop, the flirting just flops, the grades straight up drop<span style=""> </span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">It is solace but also solitude. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Look, I enjoy the show of swag just as much as Kanye</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">And if I’m chilling at a party </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">I’ll rock a pair of glasses made of plastic </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">Whose only apparent purpose is to show</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">That your vision is so good </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">That you can still see with plastic bars</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">Imprisoning your forward view </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">But I want to know when the show’s over</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">And everyone’s gone somewhere</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">That I can slip those glasses off </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">And still see my grin in a reflective material or state </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">See, confidence might be what you’ve done, who you are</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Your objectives in a relativist world </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">It is certainly the rare smile put on when you are by yourself</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Not imagining you are in the company of others. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Cognizant of your isolation </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">And still smiling. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">Please do not take this to mean that confidence is selfish. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;">It simply requires no recognition. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">New Year’s Resolution Number 11: Solidify confidence</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-size:100%;">New Year’s Resolution Number 12: Establish Swagger. </span></p>dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-19331714679719406472011-02-07T18:55:00.000-08:002011-02-07T18:56:41.827-08:00Update!What up!<br /><br />It's been a long time. Hopefully, I'll be able to post more regularly in the near future, but for tonight I just wanted to post the script for a couple of new poems I've penned this year. Hopefully I can get some video up soon as well.<br /><br />Best Wishes,<br />DKSaysdksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-22192976011252038032010-12-17T07:39:00.000-08:002010-12-17T08:49:25.691-08:00Final FinalAll Right Po-Pho Final. It's just you and me. Time to dance (so to speak). The fact that I am talking to you anthropormorphically suggests you have some things going for you--like my lack of sleep. On the other hand, I am still sentient enough to use the word antorpormorphically (possibly even spelling it correctly) and I have used my time wisely and edifying-ly. It all comes down to this. It's like the final battle in Harry Pot...EXPELLIAMUS!dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-1859978363308525472010-12-01T20:57:00.000-08:002010-12-01T21:00:57.212-08:00Objectives SubjectivitySubjective perception is a deep part of reality. Something that makes life richer. But this one. This general anxiety. This just fits in as something to be rid of for the sake of other goals.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-53712292628885830502010-11-22T23:59:00.000-08:002010-11-23T00:24:10.603-08:00Observations1. Flying Jet-Blue back to California, the airline forced us to watch a clip of Taylor Swift wishing Jet-Blue a 'happy birthday' and then to watch her music video for "Mine." It was, for me, a rare encounter with benevolent dictatorship.<br />2. Gatorade-purple-sun-set that colors the world, the ground, the bench, majestic.<br />3. In California, even when weather.com swears there will be a storm---it's still 60 degrees and sunny.<br />4. Were John Mill alive today, I'm guessing he would be a Silicon Valley Venture Capitalist (reference: "On Liberty," particularly his thoughts on the nature of genius). Which would make us practically neighbors. Fifty-fifty chance we'd be fbf's (facebook friends forever).<br />5. This is my second post in a row that uses a list. That's some meta-BOL(D)ic information for you to digest.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-63785338237970143402010-11-20T21:49:00.000-08:002010-11-20T22:00:29.952-08:00Pillows<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjslGW4dnqUrp_k-7QmKZ3cazpCSCEZifu5a2idLyLIDzjlogHQNd8pFVNL7-iYOgOV4nOM92IoZweFVeBcD7q6ppxePiK5kNiY3G80MMquIDnb7t25TIh6RdXeX_lwa4sBqCfsXYtWrlzM/s1600/product_floam_pillow.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 222px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjslGW4dnqUrp_k-7QmKZ3cazpCSCEZifu5a2idLyLIDzjlogHQNd8pFVNL7-iYOgOV4nOM92IoZweFVeBcD7q6ppxePiK5kNiY3G80MMquIDnb7t25TIh6RdXeX_lwa4sBqCfsXYtWrlzM/s320/product_floam_pillow.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5541878687181147330" border="0" /></a><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Things I Leaned About Pillows This Weekend</span><br /></div><br />1. They make traveling much more restful.<br />2. Pillow-soft abs. They can absorb a punch or two.<br />3. No better way to avoid looking like a tourist than to carry a pillow around with you. You feel at home around the whole city!<br />4. I am undefeated in unilateral pillow fights.<br />5. This post is completely metaphorical and incredibly deep. You missed that!?dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-71999045547364102142010-10-30T22:39:00.000-07:002010-10-31T07:23:24.564-07:00<style>@font-face { font-family: "Times New Roman"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }table.MsoNormalTable { font-size: 10pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; }</style><p class="MsoNormal"> </p>dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-76074967516861187762010-07-30T21:52:00.000-07:002010-07-30T23:12:28.122-07:00OptimismWell Hello, Hello! So it's been a long time, and while I can't pretend I've spent the entire hiatus ruminating deeply, I have thought and developed several opinions that might be interesting to post as blog posts--so I will try to have a long series of blog posts that I pen (type?) in the next weeks.<br /><br />But, for the topic at hand, a clash of isms. Specifically, optimism and pessimism. So as some of you might know, I'm a very optimistic person. I don't mean that superficially. I'm that type of optimistic person who just. won't. stop. I'm an in-your-face optimist. You tell me you had a bad day, I'll think (if not say outloud) that you had a learning experience. I'll lose twenty dollars, and think that it is probably stimulating the economy. Hell, the Yankees will lose and I figure it will make them hungrier in the next series of games. Yeah, I'm that kind of optimist. In fact, I don't know if there is anyone more optimistic than I am. But being an optimist, I figure there probably is a whole lot of people just as optimistic as I am.<br /><br />I've always been a fairly optimistic person--as I posted earlier in the "About Me" post with 20 facts about me, I don't remember the last time a song or a night's sleep didn't make things better. But things have gotten to a whole new level of optimism recently. It might have to due with my developing and strengthening "grassroots philosophy" view of the nature of life--in which individuals are largely free to define what has meaning in life. Equipped with such power, it is easy enough to assume that you are largely free to determine whether a given situation is happy or sad. I am not so arrogant or naive to think that my happiness and optimism is fully controllable by me and my thinking (I know biology and chemistry shaped by evolutionary processes greatly shape and limit the ability of my thinking--and I also know I don't have the faintest idea in exactly way the hard sciences do that), however, on a value-level, and thus for all intents and purposes for my conscious thinking, I've begun to think that life is life, situations are situations, and it is largely in my power to decide whether I will be optimistic or pessimistic regarding those situations and my life--and I nearly always choose optimism.<br /><br />It has gotten to the point recently, however, where hearing pessimism frustrates me, angers me. Why don't people realize they can just be optimistic!? Today, I think I've realized the necessity of pessimism, and hope to be a more reasonable and tolerant optimist in the future.<br /><br />See just as much as my "philosophy," has strengthened my optimism, I know the fortunate circumstances of my life, in which I have faced relatively very few hardships and tragedies, has insulated and fortified my optimism. But while I have had very little personal contact, it's important not to forget that deeply sad things exist in life. To be completely rigorous (or at least a little rigorous): while I still maintain that individuals can decide what has meaning and therefore to a large extent choose what is happy and sad, I know that there are things that are nearly impossible not to consider sad--because of the ingrained processes of our mind that compels them to be sad and because any value system in which life is valuable necessitates there to be deep sadness in life--simply because a part of life is death, not to mention sickness, poverty, inequity, crime, and heart-break. For all of my optimism, I've lost sight that sad things exist, and sometimes you don't need to try to--sometimes it's jarring to try to--make them positive. I'll end my post there--my first post, I believe, without some uplifting message at the end. How's that for ironic on a post titled optimism.<br /><br />Word Up,<br />DK Saysdksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-64725503100990898412010-03-17T00:49:00.001-07:002010-03-17T01:10:05.325-07:00Shades of GrayAt my house, laundry is a task performed on a grand scale. Laundry in college is to laundry at home as the Erie canal is to the Panamanian one. While in college I divide clothes into whites and colors (sometimes, if I haven't done laundry in a while, I go crazy and separate light colored clothes from dark colored clothes), at home there are many more baskets devoted to laundry, and those baskets are put to good use. Each basket houses a different shade or hue, and the color differentiation is impressive and daunting. I have to be honest, when I sort laundry from a hamper at home I always have clothes where I am not sure what basket they should go into. Is an olive green light green or is it a dark green that should go with tans? These types of decisions are very hard for me: its hard for me to just choose a basket and I often instead take shortcuts by leaving the clothes I am unsure about in the bottom of the hamper I am clearing out. Call me an unthinking, spineless perfectionist but I am going to say it like I prefer to see it: sometimes shades of gray are off-putting.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-75220816276737227472010-03-17T00:44:00.001-07:002010-03-17T00:48:52.824-07:00Post about Lack of PostsHello,<br /><br />Sorry about the lack of posts. A lot of it during the academic school year has to do with just being busy, but during spring break I can't plead the homework excuse. Some of not posting has to do with being busy enjoying other things (but when a noticeable amount of time spent enjoying other things consists of surfing espn.com and facebook it might be more appropriate to call 'enjoying other things' 'being lazy'). This would actually be my preferred reason for why I have not posted very often, but to be honest, a lot of the times I just don't have anything to talk about in a blog post at the end of the day. This is a bit disappointing as I feel in any given day I should have learned or experienced enough to make a blog post. Maybe I can go on a hot streak, and put on a good run of posts. I'll start with a couple of tonight.<br /><br />Peace,<br />Dksays.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-28016833252969278292010-02-13T21:52:00.000-08:002010-02-13T21:54:43.847-08:00dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-86551213316687901462010-01-08T22:45:00.000-08:002010-01-08T23:06:42.913-08:00Observatins from Today<ul><li>As I was driving to a coffee meeting at 9:30 in the morning, my navigation system said "destination, ahead, 500 feet, on the left." I retorted: "Your Mom's on the left." My navigation system didn't respond.<br /></li><li>Kartik pointed out that retroviruses are 'oldschool.' Which is an ironic pun because HIV, the most famous of retroviruses, was not discovered in humans until very recently.<br /></li><li>I had my first encounter of knowing someone purely from a facebook photo...I was very sure the person next to me in coffee was in a picture with a facebook friend of mind. This was quite distracting, not to mention concerning in confirming of my overuse of facebook.<br /></li><li>We did not have any candles left, so we acted out candles for our Friday night Shabbat dinner by using the same hand gestures Stanford fans use when cheering on a player during free throws. The whole spirit fingers gesture thing. What a versatile hand gesture. </li></ul>So with that *spirit figure gensture* goodbye and goodnight.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-23438351891640858692009-12-28T23:49:00.000-08:002009-12-29T00:10:57.329-08:00A Viral StoryThis break, I am looking at Yale medical labs that look interesting in the hopes of find a lab to do research at this summer. I am especially interested in a particular lab that focuses on how retroviruses, the family of virus that includes HIV, infect cells. While I was starting to read through some of the research papers that this lab has published, despite the papers being no Harry Potters and requiring more google searches (to understand certain terms) than a final exam (which needs google searches for procrastination's sake), they had an undeniable narrative. Badass, secretive retroviruses infilitrate immune cells and take over the cell's machinery. While this of course, is a well known tale, it gets more interesting as the lab begins to provide additional narrative detail. See cells that are attacked by retroviruses aren't as much military bases like Fort Sumter, which if captured simply provide ammunition and weapons for the virsues's machinations. No, immune cells are like naval ships, a la pirates of the carribean. If retroviruses can seize control of immune cells the lab has shown, it can steer and extend membrane connections, similar to rope ladders, to connect to a nearby immune-cell/ship, and 10 times more efficiently infilitrate and take over that cell/ship that it is in contact with. If the Cold War was America vs. Retroviruses, not only would we have been fighting a naval battle as aforementioned, but containment would have been an essentially pragmatic and necessary paradigm. The battle strategy would necessarily have included cutting down the rope bridges between ships a.k.a. inhibiting the formation of membrane connections that facilitate transfer of HIV virus (which the lab has shown can be done). These fairly choppy, incoherent analogies are just from a brief skimming of two papers, but I can't wait to uncover additional narration (hopefully I can even spend all summer unraveling the story if there is an opening in this lab that would allow me to work in it).<br /><br />I got to be honest, though, maybe this post is at some level inspired by my unceasing desire to be like Barack Obama. To see how Obama might see the world with a narrative-frame-of mind, read this really inetersting article http://www.gq.com/news-politics/politics/200911/barack-obama-writing-books-writer-robert-draper?printable=true (I found this article on an awesome blog called givemesomethingtoread.com, a blog which I found out about from Sean--thanks Sean!)dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-15197821041851944692009-12-24T23:07:00.000-08:002009-12-24T23:52:31.581-08:00Born to Love RunningOn my flight back to California, I read a book titled "Born to Run: A Hidden Tribe, Superathletes, and the Greatest Race the World Has Never Seen." The hidden tribe the book refers to is the Tarahumara tribe from Northern Mexico (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tarahumara). The tribe is renowned for its ability to run loooooooooooooooong distances (up to 160 km or 99.5 miles in a day according to wikipedia). To be honest, I read the book a little out of default. I was looking for a good book to take out from the Yale library to read on the plane ride, and after finding all the books I had recorded on my post-it-note of books-to-read were not available in the library (Yale allowing you to take out 150 books at a time for a month or so is great for academic papers, but it makes things rather competitive and difficult when it comes to taking out popular, more leisurely works), I moved on to books that looked interesting from the New York Times Best Seller list. Born to run was really the only one available in the library. To make the story a little more romantic, I had to go all the way up to the fourth-floor (and the auxiliary wing of the fourth floor) of our largest and most labrythian library, Sterling Memorial Library, in order to find the book--so I myself traveled long distances to find this book. The book was filled with interesting characters and annecdotes--but what I took away most from the book the was the depiction that Tarahumara really love to run. I can't imagine running 100 miles in a day, but I suppose it only makes sense that if you are going to run 100 miles in a day, you are probably going to have to love doing so. I am tempted to apply this lesson to the gym...but I gotta be honest, I just don't love running on treadmills. And I'm not going to love running on treadmills. It's not going to happen. But like the Tarahurama love a central logistic of their life, running, maybe I can come to have a similar exuberant love for the primary logistics of my life--car rides, home-work, chores, blog updating (kidding about the blog updating--not a central chore and I already enjoy it). We'll see, we'll see.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-32925602159707027982009-12-24T00:17:00.000-08:002009-12-24T00:44:31.746-08:00Writing BlockI haven't posted on my blog for quite a while, and to tell you the truth, nothing really jumps out at me to write now. Which is to say, the only thing that jumps out is that I don't really have anything in particular to say. I think that is a product of the vastness of potential thoughts, rather than a lack of opportunities for thought. In economics, my professor briefly mentioned how thought might be one of the few things that is not 'scarce'-- in other words, thought doesn't appear to be something you allocate per se. I mean you allocate your time, and thus to a certain extent, you can allocate time for thinking about different things, but you don't have a discrete quantity of thought, independent of time, that you allocate to different purposes. All the same, I too often forget this. I am intensely impatient when it comes to thoughts and discussions--I love to read and to think and to discuss, but if a novel, radio program, or even preson loses the train of thought I find relevant....well, the 'offending' party might as well have put on a red sox hat. It's hard to exactly define what I find 'relevant' but I think it relates to my rigid if general idea of what is important as well as an ability to affect the subject I am thinking about. Perhaps this impatience and devotion to relevance is truly a concession to the limits of time: I feel like I only have so much time, I need to spend it thinking about important things I can affect. But given the quantity of time I have devoted to watching Entourage, my guess is that it's not really an allocation of time thing. That's not to say that it is not related to time-- I think the combination of the infinite space of thought and the finite space of time react to form a debilitating fear. My impatience with 'irrelevant' thought is a product of the desire to do, conquer, think everything and a related fear of a fail in my pursuit of everything. Since thought is so vast, and I canot think everything, the only way I have come to differentiate between what I should think about and should not think about...wait, I guess this is an allocation which makes thought scarce by association with time. All right, fine, thought is scarce! But it isn't that scarce... So, as I was saying, the only way I have to differentiate between what I should think about and not think about is to use the metric of what is 'relevant.' But while I might not be able to think about everything, thought is not so scarce as to limit to narrow relevance. Especially because even given my prior definition of relevance, it is hard to know what will be relevant in the future. There's not too many things that aren't very scarce, (a lack of scarcity is quite scarce...hehe) so I might as well take advantage of thought. So here's to a lavish indulgence of irrelevant thought in the future.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-26250405128045891742009-11-18T21:25:00.000-08:002009-11-19T11:03:10.315-08:001st the worst, Second the Best, Third the One with the Holliday Gift SuggestionWow. I've learned a lot in the last few weeks, and for brevity (which is clearly my strong-suit), I will resort to an itemized format-Top Three Things I've learned this week.<br /><br />1. Stanford (Men's Basketball) is going to have an entertaining season. Okay, maybe this shouldn't be first, but they JUST lost to a buzzer-beating shot...and it's very, very painful :(.<br /><br />2. From Cog-Sci (and then a little more from NPR): Our decisions are influenced by a number of non-logical, non-rational factors. Things such as whether we hold a warm or a cold cup of coffee for just a second or two can heavily influence things like whether we judge a person, based on a few sentence description, friendly or non-friendly. There are likely tens of thousands (that's just a made up estimate, but it sounds impressively accurate) of these seemingly bizarre correlations, ingrained by evolution (and quirk effects of evolution), and we are unlikely to discover all of them in my mind. To find out more, including why holding a cup of warm coffee might be correlated with friendship I highly recommend the NPR Radiolab program on decisions: you can find all of Radiolabs programs at http://www.wnyc.org/shows/radiolab/ (product placement for NPR baby!) Some people have suggested this strongly challenges the notion of conscious free-will (since there are so many of these correlations that are unknowingly and strongly influencing our decisions). I take a much more moderate approach. For many decisions, I know am not fully and rationally thinking about why I make them--and I think it is quite likely that these 'heuristics' are influencing my decisions in non-rational ways--and I am not overly concerned. I know my choice of cereal is a matter of non-rational, emotional love--it's not conscious free-will, it's destiny! I nonetheless believe, however, that for more significant decisions, while some of these heuristics are nonetheless influential, rationality and consciousness can be the most influential components. At a minimum, our own consciousness of rationality suggests it plays at least a partial role (unless it is a post-fact phenomenon, but I doubt this, but I'll leave that topic out for now). Further, I think by learning some of these heuristics, we can be aware and attenuate their impact (if it is harmful) in our more important decisions.<br /><br />3. From Constitution Class (section): The official Washington D.C. License Plate has the moniker "taxation without representation." My prediction: this stuff is going to be more popular than tickle-me-elmo was in 2001 this holliday season.<br /><br /><br />I think that's going to do for tonight. Much more to come tomorrow nightdksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-48577727580973893002009-11-06T20:29:00.000-08:002009-11-06T20:30:48.553-08:00Lab ReportSo I've been 'working' for 30 minutes now, and I have the header "Results and Calculations: Part 1." Productive 1/2 hour. I think I need to learn how to study on Friday nights for the next couple of weeks.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-39737100898407113062009-11-02T21:57:00.000-08:002009-11-03T07:34:58.788-08:00Grassroots PhilosopherHey!<br /><br />So the first open-slam for Teeth (<a href="http://www.teethpoets.com/Home.html">website</a>) is next Friday, November 13th, which is pretty exciting. I've been working for a while on the first poem I will perform for the slam (if it goes well, I will perform another poem for the final round of the slam).<br /><br />I think this poem has a lot more imagery than past poem's, so I like it in that sense. I've also been trying to play a little more with word-play, which resulted in a trade-off with a little less syllable structure and rhyme scheme. So those are just stylistic things, but hopefully the main component of any of my spoken words is always the structuring through vocalization of a sort-of-abstract idea I've been mulling over, so I hope you get a good sense of the idea! And with that, I've wasted enough blog space, so I'll paste my poem below. Hopefully after the show, I'll have a video of my performance to post.<br /><br /><br />Will this one’s for you.<br />See Will Shakespeare says “All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players.”<br />And while I didn’t particularly like Romeo and Juliet in school<br />I promise it’s not for lack of love<br />When I say I can’t agree with Shakespeare<br />Because if only all men and women were players<br />Were actors<br />But take me for example<br />Me, I’m not yet an actor<br />Me, I’m just a wannabe<br />I’m just a wannabe good in life cuz that alone would suffice<br />I’m just a grass-roots philosopher<br />Theorizing on what’s wrong and what’s righter<br />I guess that’s what makes me a Writer<br />So I write this as I continue to ponder<br />Hoping that through thought, I become stronger<br />Knowing that it’s damn cliché to take life as fodder<br />When you realize that thought goes much broader<br />I hereby certify I understand,<br />But I also stand under<br />the weight of being a wannabe<br />Because if you stopped me today, see<br />And you asked me for what this life is<br />If you asked me for my two cents<br />I’d be compelled to ask you to take a mail-in rebate<br />Because I couldn’t quite provide you with fate<br />But I wouldn’t leave you empty-handed<br />I’d tell you sir or ma’am, I’ve been branded<br />Right where my ventricle conjoins with my amygdala<br />And if you look close enough, you can see it<br />I haven’t sold out, so the brand isn’t commercial<br />No the brand is philosophical<br />And I wear my philosophy on my sleeves<br />I just don’ know what to do with my sleeves<br />So they just hang there with their insignia proclaiming<br />“I’m just a wannabe,”<br />And I know as a wannabe<br />With my two, too-long philosophical sleeves<br />I make a sight that’s little more<br />Than a child dressed up in a Self-Righteous costume<br />Hoping that all the now-closed doors I knock on<br />Give way to treats, not tricks<br />Illumination, not confusion<br />And I know like all wannabe’s<br />I’m little more than a cacophony of loud uncertainty<br />But I promise that I’m a unique brand of wannabe<br />a wannabe good in life<br />A grass-roots philosopher<br />Theorizing on what’s wrong and what’s righter<br />Compelled by my realization that this life is valuable<br />And I keep an open mind, but that point is non-negotiable<br />So let me repeat<br />This life is valuable<br />See I contend sometimes we’re too preoccupied with studying what’s inherent<br />With our A,C,T and G’s<br />the lettered building blocks of DNA<br />And for good and edifying reasons<br />But it’s been established<br />That l-i-f-e is more than the four letters in the word<br />More than the four letters of DNA<br />More than what’s endowed from the start<br />You see reality is far more than a sum of inherencies<br />And I’m not implying life does not have a sufficient, inherent meaning<br />Endowed from God or religion, objective and ad perpetuum<br />I’m just saying if that’s the case<br />I couldn’t prove it<br />But I’m not overly concerned<br />Because if life has no-inherent meaning<br />Then life at birth is simply a blank refrigerator door, definitely stainless steel, probably modern and chic<br />but also barren<br />And it is no more right to add the fridge magnets and pictures and notes<br />It’s just more beautiful<br />You see without an inherent, objective meaning<br />If our refrigerator door does not come<br />With alphabetic magnets that spell out destiny<br />It is no more right for me to leave the doors un-lettered<br />Than to arrange the colored magnets thematically<br />To spell out love or human rights or happiness<br />If I am not tasked a task<br />That leaves me the victim of a beautiful strife<br />To decide to write or not to write the poem of my life<br />To be or not to be<br />And I’ll be straight up I’ve chosen Shakespeare<br />But just like I can really only scan Shakespeare<br />Stopping to Glance at the left-hand definitions of old-English words<br />I can only point to an fMRI scan of my life’s script<br />and show you right there, right there where the image lights up like a neon site proclaiming “We’re open.” That’s where my life has meaning<br />and I can tell you with my personal assumptions<br />I’ve localized the meaning of life to<br />in the simplest terms-being good.<br />But like the scientist that can’t explain<br />the mechanism that produces that thought<br />lit up in the fMRI scan<br />I couldn’t tell you how I plan about validating my meaning of life—of being “good.”<br />And it east me up like there’s a 100 undergrads converging on free food<br />Until I’m left footing the bill working as a wannabe<br />A Wannabe good in life<br />A grass roots philosopher theorizing on what’s wrong and what’s righter<br />And I know that makes me loud and self-righteous<br />Unsure and cocky<br />But I assure you<br />That's only because I do believe<br />in Shakespere's Vision<br />in which all the men and women can be actors<br />So I’m working and growing<br />And my manuscript will be written<br />And then I’ll be able to see through Shakespeare’s eyes<br />And I’ll be ready to join the Thesbians<br />Through my actions I too will become an actor<br />And that’s a reassuring thought<br />Because they say a picture is worth a thousand words<br />And I spit cuz I don't that's true<br />But I do know an act is worth at least a thousand pictures.<br />So right now I’m just a wannabe<br />All moralizing sentiments and hand-drawn pictures of righteousness<br />But one-day I’ll just be an actor.<br />And, so Will, this one’s for you.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-88538279924872669822009-09-30T21:39:00.000-07:002009-09-30T21:46:25.457-07:00Spoken Word Updates!So a few updates on how spoken word is going. I'm part of a group on campus called Teeth http://www.teethpoets.com/Members.html (I'll be up there soon!), which is quite exciting. Yale has many, many incredible spoken word poets and it's been a pleasure to watch them perform and learn from them. A couple of spoken word groups also worked together to bring in a very talented professional poet, Shihan, to campus today, and his performance was AMAZING. You can check out one of his poems at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LusRcLdvDgc. I figure I also owe you guys a poem, but I can't quite show you a new one I'm working on, because it's really not ready, but here's a significantly edited version of an earlier poem (well, a significant addition was added). It's called ingratiating for gratitude.<br /><br />I’ve never been ravished by foreclosure before<br />And I in no way mean to make light of the plight<br />But I can’t help imagining the angle between my actions and foreclose runs 180 degrees<br />Parallel.<br />Because while my announcement is not white wood with a flap swinging in the breeze<br />Sharp point planted in the grass, so seemingly mundane<br />But Bank Name seared into the hanging plane<br />My signs are no less vivid nor clashing.<br />I too, am desperate to unload to any reasonable buyer<br />An artificially low outcome doesn’t seem too dour<br />I’m constantly putting myself up for auction<br />I just want to regain somethin’<br />My foreclosure though wasn’t caused by a contracting economy that’s appalling<br />A loss of work, or income that that was free-falling<br />My foreclosure was the result of adding another job<br />You see Currently<br />I’m selling out.<br />Which is funny cuz there’s not even money<br />But I assure you<br />I’m selling out<br />And I’m looking for an out<br />[…]<br />Split and sautéed in a sauce that’s pooled<br />But I still expect my auto ten percent gratuity<br />Cuz this, this must be a large enough party<br />And im hoping you like me even more<br />Cash in another ten percent at the door<br />But then here’s how the evening was usurped<br />See, you’re ticked off wish you were in Europe<br />Where the only things that are tips, are the extremity of an object<br />And I, I’m wishing I was working on a new project<br />Because speaking of objects, there’s more than that I’d like to see<br />See, I’m still just a waiter<br />But I’ve waited far too long for this obsession to abate<br />So I don’t mean to hate,<br />But I strongly dislike<br />I’d like for it to take a hike<br />This predilection where I’m constantly estimating if I’m liked<br />So no, I don’t have a resume or an alternate frame of view<br />But I assure you, I’m looking for something new.<br />Because I know if I can shed this current work.<br />My progressively mortgaged me can be regained<br />The judge ruling this foreclosure was just insane.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-20706628034115814932009-09-10T22:06:00.000-07:002009-09-10T22:29:46.280-07:00Prof. EarthWhat up world. I know you have a ton of students, and I don't really have any specific questions at this moment, but I figured I'd take this time during your informal office hours to formally introduce myself. Hopefully, I'll get to know you a lot better over the next few years, and you can get to know me better too.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-87267030242445120622009-09-07T21:33:00.000-07:002009-09-07T21:48:32.495-07:00Short Spoken Word<div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://rsic.puchd.ac.in/images/image002.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 339px; height: 506px;" src="http://rsic.puchd.ac.in/images/image002.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>(SEM Microscope. Image from: http://rsic.puchd.ac.in/images/image002.jpg).<br /></div><br />It's about being short. But it's my longest one yet. What up! (It's longer not as much because I have more to say, but because I want to start making my spoken words a little longer). I'll try to have a video of it being performed on facebook soon, and I'll also soon hopefully make a post about some of my thoughts and experiences since I started college (briefly: I am trying out for two spoken word groups, one tomorrow and one saturday!), but for now just this spoken word.<br /><br />Five Foot Five<br /><br />Part 1: Me<br />To the metric system<br />Or I suppose it’s just the American<br />Us and our unilateral action<br />But to whatever measurements system we use<br />I stand 5 foot five inches<br />And that’s short.<br />Naturally you might be asking<br />Do I have a Napolen Complex?<br />So I respond, no.<br />No, I don’t have a Napolen Complex.<br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 204, 255);">(Although if I did, I probably wouldn’t tell you. </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 204, 255);">But no I don’t. </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 204, 255);">In fact my whole life I have and will work tirelessly trying to fail everything to prove I don’t have a Napolen complex. </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 204, 255);">Just kidding. </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 204, 255);">So here’s the truth</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 204, 255);">I don’t have a Napolen complex)</span><br />In fact I have a nothingness complex<br />Not no complex, but nothingness<br />Cuz you see to myself sometimes I seem microscopic, nanoscopic,<br />I sell myself short<br />In exchange for an expanse<br />Of excuses and pity<br />But here’s the thing<br />The rates on excuses and self-pity<br />Just crashed, and their value is vacuity<br />As evaluated by the international board on being real.<br />The new value of the old set equates<br />To Empty emotional space<br />perhaps even debt<br />What I’m trying to say<br />Is it’s not something I want.<br />It’s not something I value,<br />or that has value.<br />And I know I’m about to make things a lil distended<br />On The Microeconomics lecture I just attended<br />But the opportunity cost for standing up full 5’5’’<br />Is Nill.<br />Do ya feel?<br />Other than the activation energy required<br />To break the self-conscious chains acquired<br />There is no cost of self-confidence<br />Only the exothermic enjoyment<br />Like I was oxygen, and here’s my breath of fresh air.<br />There is a reason for you to talk to me<br />like there is a reason for me to talk to you.<br />To learn, to laugh, to ‘shoot the shit.’<br />I am five foot five. I am right here.<br />And This poem, is my homogenous catalyst<br />This poem, is meant to fill the cyst<br />Of my fragile willingness to engage.<br />So in the adapted words of Bon Qui Qui<br />security..it’s time for this cyst to go.<br /><br /><br />Part 2: Others<br />Because here’s the worst part<br />Of my diffidence<br />Its like bad vector transformation<br />It’s one thing to inflict myself<br />But then I map my own insecurities on you<br />So 1. You now also need an SEM microscope<br />Or at least huge ass binoculuars to cope<br />And have the ability to perceive me<br />And 2.<br />I’m embarrassed to say this truly<br />But your value is adjusted retributively<br />To the physical appearance of you I see<br />But I’m tired of making you the judge of me<br />More so, me the defensive, vapid judge of you.<br />And it’s time to end this corrupting view.<br />The cessation only requires proper functioning<br />Of that inner strength of confidence.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />So therefore. Part 3: Conclusion.<br />I am five’ foot five, readily in sight.<br />Hello, my name is David, it’s a pleasure to meet you all here tonight<br /><br />~DKSaysdksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5917860432347709453.post-63323460288730070812009-08-21T00:03:00.000-07:002009-08-21T00:31:06.956-07:00Perspective<div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.uncp.edu/home/acurtis/Courses/PhotographyMay04/images/StudentPhotos/JamieConnerton/SpriteTimes3.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 289px; height: 289px;" src="http://www.uncp.edu/home/acurtis/Courses/PhotographyMay04/images/StudentPhotos/JamieConnerton/SpriteTimes3.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a></div><br />Perspective is a fascinating phenomena. Outside of an academic setting (like college :O), outside of the physical sciences there is very little 'fact'-- but there is a lot of room for perspective to maneuver.<br /><br />I've written in the past on both sides of the spectrum: in middle school I believe I wrote a poem comparing perspective to a very tall mountain, Everest if you will, from which the view is unparalleled, edifying--but at which elevation it is impossible to dwell forever. Your perspective simply can not always dwell at the loftiest levels of insight--sometimes it has to climb down a bit. <span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);"></span>Just like in a book, conflict is an inherent part of life. Maybe it is genetically ingrained with the purpose of continually having us problem-solve--without problems you can't solve--or maybe it is something else. But conflict is an inevitable and even necessary part of life. And a perspective too high would preclude conflict.<br /><br /><br /><br />At the same time, there is a very fine line between conflict and drama--between truly concerning conflict and problems begot from a gross descent into non-perspective. Even genuine conflict, wherever that barometer may lie, can certainly be overwhelming, confusing, and distorting at high and/or frequent doses. I've written with vehemence (or attempted vehemence) about my desire to raise my usual level of perspective-to stop dwelling on the petty problems that distract me from the true conflicts that are on the horizon (see way previous post: spoken word script 3).<br /><br />Tonight I seek to be a true moderate, I do not intend to promote a side or caution against a side. I simply seek to note and appreciate how truly refreshing it is to have those moments when your perspective is deepened. Like a reset button on your problems, those issues that have been torturing you for the recent past just seem to lose their edge or flit away entirely into the realm of insignificance. The only appropriate image I can conjure for how amazing it feels is those old sprite commercials where someone would take a sip and then go "Ahhhh." I've never felt those emotions those actors seem to portray sipping soda, but I certainly feel them sipping on perspective.<br /><br />Ahhh.dksay(s)http://www.blogger.com/profile/05216822442608904449noreply@blogger.com0